A friend wrote after I posted my last two blogs “Who are we?” and “Who are we? A follow-up” by asking: “Have you been studying existentialism? Looks that way to me.”

My short answer is no, I haven’t been studying it. But, the question deserved a fuller response, so here it is.

First, I don’t believe in fate or in a supernatural power that deliberately determines who lives and who dies in any particular time or place, as the Unetaneh Tokef prayer of Rosh Hashanah asserts. I approach that prayer on the High Holidays as metaphor, that life is fragile and we humans have to do everything possible to preserve and promote life based on the ‘unity principle’ as stated in the Shema. Not only is doing so the morally right thing to do, but is based on the perspective of enlightened self-interest, that we all need each other across communities, cultures, ethnicities, religions, races, genders, and national identities, and therefore we need to be prepared to climb the barricades in defense of any of us should we be attacked based on bigotry and hatred.

Second, I believe that the ongoing welfare of the Jewish people is important in and of itself based on our core values (see below) and therefore important for the world as a whole.

These words set the stage for Jews long ago about our relationships with one another: “Kol Yisrael aravim zeh bazeh – all Israel is responsible for one another” (Talmud, Shavuot 39a), “Al tifros min ha-tzibur – Don’t separate yourself from the community” (Mishnah, Avot 2:5), and  Rabbi Shimon bar Yochai’s story about the man selfishly drilling a hole under his seat in a boat proclaiming that he had the right to do so because it was under his seat regardless of the fact that water will doom all the passengers in the boat. (Midrash Rabbah, Vayikra 4:6,)

Dr. King expanded the principle of our interdependency this way, which I wholeheartedly accept: “Our world is a neighborhood…We are tied together in the single garment of destiny, caught in an inescapable network of mutuality. And whatever affects one directly affects all indirectly.” (March 31, 1968)

Onto the existentialist dilemma – I accept this part of the existentialist position, that each of us is a free and responsible agent who must determine our respective development and course in life through deliberate willful acts and thereby create for ourselves purpose and meaning.

I do not believe, however, in another aspect of existentialism that asserts life as an absurdity, that no one – not God, not cultures or other people, not ruling authorities – can offer us ultimate meaning and purpose though family comes awfully close. Nor do I believe that we are blank slates at birth. To the contrary, children must be educated and learn to choose good over evil. I take it as an act of faith that the virtues Judaism teaches are interwoven into the fabric of a moral universe – goodness (tov), justice (tzedek), compassion (rachamim), wisdom (chochmah), understanding (binah), respect/dignity (kavod), and peace/wholeness/integrity (shalom-shleimut).

The opening chapter of the Book of Genesis affirms repeatedly that the created world is “good” (ki tov) and that the human being is created “b’tzelem Elohim – in the divine image” (Genesis 1:26). As such, we are thinking beings (as God is imaged as a ‘thinking Being’) and we have the capacity to be aware that we are imbued with infinite value and worth (Mishnah Avot 3:14 – Rabbi Heschel called this awareness “radical amazement” at the very fact of our existence). Our challenge therefore, as Reconstructionist Judaism postulated, is to be “Godly,” that is to embrace our tradition’s moral virtues and act accordingly in every dimension of our lives, private and public.

We don’t merely exist, as the existentialist proclaims. I regard myself as an ‘essentialist’ in that I believe there’s an “essence” to every human being. That essence is called the soul/neshamah – the “life-breath” or “Godly” element in each of us. Judaism affirms that the neshamah is Eternal and Ineffable, that it is a reality separate from the material world, and that it enables us to envision and imagine ourselves as linked to all things, intrinsic within the created world, and committed to restoring the world in “the image of the dominion of the Godly” (Tikun olam). The neshamah is that part of every human being that can (if we allow it) guide us to become moral beings.

Whether we are existentialists seeking to overcome absurdity, or essentialists seeking to live according to a higher moral standard, or anything else, our behavior freely chosen ultimately is the determining factor about who we are, who we become, how we are known to others, and how we regard ourselves.

The danger of existentialist thinking, in my view, is that one can be led to cynicism about life and the world given the existentialist claim that life is an absurdity and has no meaning. For me, my faith in Jewish tradition’s prophetic values and aspirations are based in the religious truth that each human being is infinitely valuable and worthy and each of us can become an agent for decency, justice, and compassion. This comports well with my own innate optimism (i.e. seeing the half-full glass) despite difficult times and the presence of far too many evil actors in the world.

I thank my friend for the question. I hope my response clarifies my orientation, Jewish and world-views, and basis for faith.

​In the thirteen years that I’ve been blogging, I can’t remember a blog that attracted more views and responses than the one I posted last week called “Who are we?”

Among the responses, I received a question from a relatively recent retiree who told me that he felt stuck in depression as a consequence of the loss of his professional identity. He asked me for specific strategies that I used in my own transition into retirement that might help lift him from his depression and reestablish his identity and sense of well-being post-retirement.

Before listing some of the strategies that I shared with him privately, I believe that it’s important to understand that regardless of how we leave a position (i.e. voluntarily or involuntarily), our sense of being productive and our need to be relevant are core issues that contribute to our sense of well-being.

Here are some of the attitudes, actions, and strategies that helped me refocus my life after serving for 40 years as a congregational rabbi:

1. Take justifiable pride in our professional accomplishments, in what we learned, created, initiated, and built, in the people we touched, mentored, and helped, and in the legacy of hard work and commitment for which we were known by colleagues and those we served.
2. Each of us has a unique personal story to tell and we ought to tell it not only for ourselves as an exercise in self-reflection, but also for the sake of our children and the generations to come that they know the nature of the legacy they inherited from us. I wrote my memoirs soon after my retirement in which I noted the most significant events and people in my life that helped to shape my values and life-perspective. I included in it a detailed family tree, photographs of my parents and grandparents, and other photos of important personal memorabilia.   
3. Become a mentor to someone starting out in your former profession, business, or occupation. Many of us had mentors when we were young who helped guide us and who we recall still with special affection and gratitude. We can offer what we’ve learned too to younger people.
4. Offer your expertise pro bono to those in need – if you were in business, help someone start, grow, or save a business. If you were a lawyer, offer your counsel to those who can’t afford an attorney. If you were a social worker, therapist, nurse, or doctor, volunteer at a clinic. If you were a teacher, help kids read and older students succeed. If you favor political candidates, work for their election.
5. Volunteer – Determine your favorite cause(s) and advocate for them.
6. Find a creative outlet as an artist, sculptor, potter, writer, poet, musician, composer, singer, or dancer – not for “show” but to re-engage yourself as a creative being.
7. Learn something new or enhance what you already know in an area of study.
8. Nurture and deepen your experience of the Ineffable through prayer, meditation, silence, yoga, reading, study, being in nature, and engagement with the arts.
9. Exercise daily – Walking outside even for 20 minutes each day is important, especially for older folks, and more time as we increase strength and stamina. Experts note that exposure to the sun increases our serotonin levels and helps us stave off “Seasonal Affective Disorder” (SAD). Sun exposure can also help people with anxiety and depression, especially in combination with other treatments.
10. Get enough REM sleep (7-8 hours uninterrupted sleep for most adults is the minimum recommendation) and eat moderately. If you have trouble sleeping, check with your doctor about possible causes and what ways there are to address them.
11. Reach out to people suffering illness and loss. Throughout my rabbinate, my visiting with and/or calling someone who was suffering were among the most meaningful contacts I had for both them and me.
12. Stay in regular contact with the people you love.
13. Read widely, listen to music, and watch quality films, documentaries, dramas, and comedy that inspire and provide relaxation and relief.
14. Do everything in moderation and nothing to excess.
15. If you are depressed, get psychological and/or psychiatric help, and accept medication if it is so indicated. But, don’t self-medicate with alcohol or drugs.
16. Don’t fret if you’re bored from time to time. It happens.
17. Allow enough space in your daily schedule to welcome into your life new opportunities for engagement.
18. Do nothing you don’t wish to do. Abandon strategies and activities that are failing or that disinterest you. Disengage with people who make you feel continually unworthy, angry, frustrated, and unhappy. In retirement, we have the license to choose how and with whom we spend our time and resources, and we ought to take full advantage of that license.

My mother (z’l) was alone for most of her life after my father died when she was only 42 years-old. She lived to be 98. She once told me – “The only thing keeping me from engaging with the world is the front door. All I have to do is walk through it.”

Those are a few of the suggestions I made to my reader. I hope they helped.

The 19^th century psychologist and philosopher William James wrote:

“Whenever two people meet, there are really six people present. There is each person as they see themselves, each person as others see them, and each person as they really are.”

It’s important to be able to separate the three perspectives, and then to focus on the last of the three identities most deeply.

I’ve been asking myself who I really am since I retired from the active congregational rabbinate two-and-a-half years-ago. When I retired, the designation “Rabbi” (in the congregational sense) was no longer applicable to me, though I remain a rabbi even without a congregation (I’m privileged to hold the honorific title Rabbi Emeritus).

This week I decided to think and write about my changed identity in my personal journal as an exercise in self-clarification without planning to publish it. After finishing, however, I realized that there are take-aways that are generally transferable to everyone.

I passed this week my 72^nd birthday (a quadruple chai of years) and realize that I’ve experienced roughly four life-stages (or long chapters) through which my identity changed and evolved.

The first stage concluded when I was nine years-old and my father died suddenly. Next came my young adulthood with my decision to enter rabbinical school. The third included all the years of rabbinic study and service as a congregational rabbi. And now I’m in my post-retirement period.  

I’m not all that different from anyone else, though I made a choice early on that few people make, to become a rabbi/teacher/pastor, a role in my community that privileged me to engage with others amidst the most important moments in their lives – joyful, sad, and challenging. All my encounters with others over forty years taught me not only much about them, of course, but about myself as a fellow sojourner. I’ve tried to learn from everyone I’ve met and from everything I’ve done, as well as from the history, traditions, and experiences of the Jewish people, and from the wisdom, thought, and creativity of inspired thinkers, artists, and cultures the world-over.

For me, I’m a happy husband, father, grandfather, brother, and friend; a happily retired congregational rabbi; a learner, seeker, thinker, and writer; an advocate for justice and fairness in America and around the world; a believer in the power of simple human kindness to touch the lives of others; a democrat (with both large and small “d’s”); a Progressive Reform Zionist and lover of the People, Land, and State of Israel; a cancer survivor who’s grateful for my physicians and health care workers, and who works hard to remain healthy for as long as possible.

I’m surely not one thing alone. I have many identities, each intersecting with one another. Each of us is an emanation of our family histories and genetics, and we’re shaped by our experiences of loss and gain. We’re political beings bound by culture, institutions, societal and historic events and norms. We’re creative beings, and most of us want to be productive and relevant, appreciated and loved by the people we love and respect. None of us can predict the future, but we have the agency to make considered choices based on what we’ve done and learned, on our core beliefs and values, and on how we believe we can best help others.

We’re all bit players in each other’s lives even with the mistakes we’ve made. Hopefully, we’re able to acknowledge our imperfections, apologize when we err and hurt others, take responsibility for ourselves without casting blame, strive to do better, and choose to nurture relationships of meaning.

Given that we live in increasingly polarized American and Israeli cultures, maintaining balance, equanimity, and civility are huge personal, moral, and communal challenges. We Jews are a choosing people after all, and we ought not to allow ourselves to drift thoughtlessly or be led by intolerant, myopic, self-centered, and soul-less actors.

For me I’m happy to be able to wake up each day, drink a strong cup of coffee (a little resurrection in the morning), read the latest news and commentary, write some, take a long walk in my neighborhood, greet the people on the street I see each day, and continue through the hours reading, writing more, spending unpressured time with my wife and family, seeing friends, engaging with my interests, and feeling grateful that I’ve lived as long as I have with the hope that I have many more years ahead.   

“‘We’re not touching it’: PM, Kahana shelve plan for Western Wall egalitarian plaza – Bennett, religious affairs minister agree to suspend implementation of compromise for pluralistic prayer at site, as ultra-Orthodox and Likud use controversy to fire up opposition”

So reads the headline of today’s (December 12, 2021) article in The Times of Israel that I urge you to read if you are concerned at all about the integrity of Israeli democracy, equal rights for Jews around the world, and religious pluralism in the Jewish State. Every Israeli and Diaspora Jew ought to be worried that the Israeli government refuses to do the right thing on behalf of world Jewry. (see link below)

Political expediency sadly has given way (again) to the most extreme right-wing minority voices in Israel. The “Western Wall Compromise” of 2016, worked out painstakingly over a three-year period and led by former Jewish Agency Director Natan Sharansky at the behest of Former Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu with the then-approval of the majority of Knesset members, would have created a dignified prayer space at the Kotel just south of the traditional prayer space under Robinson’s Arch that was equal in size and significance to the traditional prayer space, and Jews from around the world would not have had to abide by the constrictive rules and regulations of extremist right-wing Haredi rabbis in order to pray and gather together peacefully without being accosted by screaming screeching coffee-throwing bullies who have for decades been aided and abetted in their narrow-minded intolerant vision of what constitutes Judaism by their self-righteous rabbis.

That most sacred space in Judaism, the Western Wall (“Kotel”), belongs to the entire Jewish people, not just to the most extremist Jewish fringe that has co-opted the space and plaza and defined it all as its own ultra-Orthodox Shul. The government compromise of 2016 would have assured Jewish religious rights for all Jews in Israel and around the world by creating an alternate prayer space that could be used without interference by Reform, Conservative, Reconstructionist, and egalitarian Jews, Women of the Wall, and any Jew who wished to pray freely and with dignity at this most sacred site in all of Judaism. The Kotel compromise is NOT strictly a Jewish State matter nor is it at its core a political matter. Rather, it addresses the legitimate religious needs of the Jewish people as a whole without infringing on the rights and needs of orthodox and ultra-Orthodox Jews in a democratic State of Israel.

Democracy, religious pluralism, debate, compromise, and Klal Yisrael were sadly sacrificed on the altar of political expediency and right-wing fanaticism by this government’s decision to keep its hands off this sensitive but important matter for world Jewry.

For shame!

https://www.timesofisrael.com/were-not-touching-it-pm-kahana-shelve-plan-for-western-wall-egalitarian-plaza/?utm_source=The+Weekend+Edition&utm_campaign=weekend-edition-2021-12-12&utm_medium=email

This blog also appears at The Times of Israel – https://blogs.timesofisrael.com/for-shame-government-again-shelves-western-wall-egalitarian-plaza/

As Trump-Republicans seek to undo every legislative hurdle, take away power over elections from every legitimate non-partisan State Secretary of State, and pass laws to make it far easier to control the results of the 2022 and 2024 elections despite the majority will of Americans across the country, President Biden, Congressional and State Democrats ought to be shouting from the rafters every day about the importance of passing major voting rights legislation as their first order of business. There is nothing more important to American democracy than preserving our election system – not BBB, not the Debt Limit, not climate issues, not foreign policy (as important as all of these are). For none of these issues can be effectively addressed in an American authoritarian society led by the likes of Trump and his sycophants.

President Biden, to his credit, gave a comprehensive and excellent voting rights speech last July – but, he has said virtually nothing since, until yesterday. At last, at the Democracy summit, as quoted by Heather Cox Richardson in her excellent daily “Letters from an American”:

“Biden vowed to protect journalists around the world from persecution and to continue to fight for the passage of voting rights and election protection legislation. He mentioned by name the Freedom to Vote Act and the John Lewis Voting Rights Advancement Act, which would prevent voter suppression, make it easier to vote, and dismantle the 33 new restrictive elections laws that Republican-dominated legislatures in 19 states have passed.”

“We should be making it easy for people to vote, not harder.” Biden said. “And that’s going to remain a priority for my administration until we get it done. Inaction is not an option.” 

I have assumed that once the President and Congress pass some version of the Build Back Better bill that he will turn to voting rights. I have not understood, however, why he can’t walk and chew gum at the same time. Why has he waited to talk about this fundamental threat to American democracy being prepared step-by-step and strategically by the Trump-Republican Party in virtually every state and congressional jurisdiction. If history is prologue, every successful major legislative effort has been preceded by constant rhetoric at the highest levels in our national and state politics. Yes, many leaders and political pundits and commentators around the country have been talking about this, but the President’s voice is the single most important one, and he has to talk about this every day to soften the ground leading to a set-aside of the congressional filibuster for democracy issues and then the passage of a major bill in the House and Senate to protect elections, eliminate gerrymandering, control money in politics, assure same day registration and mail-in voting, eliminate voter intimidation at polling places, and keep the power over state election certification in non-partisan hands, among other things.

Why has he waited? What is he waiting for? The time is now!

If you live in a district in which a Democrat represents you, do consider writing to them and the White House to insist that the President begin the rhetorical campaign to pass voting rights legislation now.

Ten years ago Noam Zion, Senior Fellow Emeritus of the Kogod Research Center at the Shalom Hartman Institute in Jerusalem, in a talk to a group of rabbis in Los Angeles argued that Hanukah is a battleground for the heart and soul of Judaism, the State of Israel, and the Jewish people. What follows are the highlights of his thoughts.

From its beginnings (© 165 B.C.E.) to the present, Hanukah has represented very different things for the founders of the State of Israel, American liberal non-Haredi Jews, and Chabad. Based on Hanukah’s tendentious history and the corpus of sermons written by rabbis through the centuries, three questions have been asked consistently: Who are the children of light and darkness? Who are our people’s earliest heroes and what made them heroic? And what relevance can we find in Hanukah today?

Though religiously a “minor holyday” (Hanukah is not biblically based, nor do the restrictions apply that are associated with Shabbat, Pesach, Shavuot, Succot, Rosh Hashanah, and Yom Kippur), Hanukah occupies a place in each of the ideologies of the State of Israel, American liberal Judaism, and Chabad.

Before and after the establishment of the State of Israel, the Maccabees were a potent symbol for “Political Zionism” for those laboring to create a modern Jewish state. The early Zionists rejected God’s role in bringing about the miracle of Jewish victory during the period of the Hasmoneans. Rather, Max Nordau, Theodor Herzl, David Ben Gurion, Chaim Weizmann, Jacob Klatzkin, and A.D. Gordon all emphasized that Jews themselves are the central actors in our people’s restoration of Jewish sovereignty on the ancient land, not God.

For 20^th century liberal American Jews Hanukah came to represent Judaism’s aspirations for religious freedom consistent with the American value of religious freedom as affirmed by the first Amendment of the US Constitution. Even as the holiday of Hanukah reflects universal aspirations, the Hanukiyah is a particular symbol of Jewish pride and identity for American Jews living in a dominant Christian culture.

For Chabad, Hanukah reveals the essence of religious identity and defines the mission of Jews. Each Chasid is to be “a streetlamp lighter” who goes into the public square and kindles the nearly extinguished flame of individual Jewish souls, one soul at a time (per Rebbe Sholom Dov-Ber). This is why Chabad strives to place a Hanukiah in public places and why Chasidim offer to help Jews don t’filin. Every fulfilled mitzvah kindles the flame of a soul and restores it to God.

The cultural war being played out in contemporary Jewish life is based in the responses to the central and historic question that has always given context to Hanukah – ‘Which Jews are destroying Jewish life and threatening Judaism itself?’

The Maccabean war was not a war between the Jews and the Greeks. Rather, it was a violent civil war sparked by enmity between the established radically Hellenized Jews and the besieged village priests living outside major urban centers (the High Priest in Jerusalem had already been co-opted by Hellenization). The Maccabees won the war because moderately Hellenized Jews recognized that they would lose their own Jewish identity if the radical Hellenizers were victorious. They joined in coalition with the village priests and together took the Temple and rededicated it. That historic struggle has a parallel today in a raging cultural civil war for the heart and soul of the Jewish people and for the nature of Judaism itself.

The take-away for us today? There is something of the zealot in each of us, regardless of our respective Jewish camp. If we hope to avoid our past sins of sinat chinam (baseless hatred between one Jew and another that the Talmud teaches was the cause of the destruction of the 2^nd Temple in 70 C.E.) we need to prepare our own constituencies to be candles without knives, to bring the love of God and the Jewish people back into our homes and communities. To be successful will take courage, compassion, knowledge, understanding, and faith. The stakes are very high – the future of the State of Israel and the Jewish people.

Is it any wonder that Hanukah, though defined by Judaism as a “minor holiday,” is a major battle-ground for the heart and soul of Judaism and the Jewish people?

This blog also appears at The Times of Israel – https://blogs.timesofisrael.com/hanukah-and-the-contemporary-jewish-cultural-civil-war/