Tag Archives: Jewish Identity

The Reawakening to Love Again – A Memorial to Moshe Tabak

21 Sunday Jun 2015

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Moshe Tabak was 90 years old when he died last week. Originally from Sigid, Czechoslovakia, he was the descendent of a distinguished line of chassidic Dayanim (scholars and judges) and was one of eleven children.

Moshe’s father was a wealthy land-owner in Czechoslovakia before the war, and so when the Nazis took over the country in 1939, he felt resistant to leave despite his wife’s urgent pleas. He reasoned that the bad times would pass and they should wait it out.

Tragically, he and almost all the family were murdered in Auschwitz, except Moshe, one older brother and a younger sister who survived work camps.

After the war at a port in Rumania, Moshe was waiting to board a Haganah boat that would take him and hundreds of refugees to Palestine. He was standing in a bread line when he spotted Miriam, a girl two years younger than him. Charmed, he reached out and offered her chocolate. Miriam remembers that Moshe was wearing a hat, had beautiful blue eyes and curly hair.

Once on board the ship, Moshe became sea-sick, and Miriam nursed him. They fell in love quickly and two years later, in 1947, they married in Palestine.

Theirs was a love-match from the beginning. Jewish legend relates that at creation each soul was split in two into what is called a palga gufa, a half-soul, and then each half moves through time and multiple lives in a sea of souls seeking its other half to become whole again.

Moshe and Miriam believed they had originally been one soul and that each was the other’s beshert, intended one – soul-mate. Their love was so deep and sustaining, they couldn’t imagine it otherwise.

Together Moshe and Miriam parented four children who in turn brought them nine grandchildren and then six great-grandchildren – L’dor vador.

Last summer, Moshe and Miriam, now living in Los Angeles and together for 70 years, aging and frail, moved in with their youngest daughter and son-in law, Debi and Ofer, and their four children Orly, Danielle, Aleeza, and Bradley, members of our congregation for many years. Their youngest two, twins, had been preparing to become bar and bat mitzvah yesterday on Shabbat Parashat Korach (Numbers 16:1-18:32).

Sadly, we buried Moshe at 3 PM on Friday just before Shabbat. The family attended Kabbalat Shabbat services to say Kaddish. Tradition discourages public mourning on the Sabbath.

Yesterday morning, despite the family’s loss of its loving and gentle patriarch, convened to celebrate Aleeza’s and Bradley’s b’nai mitzvah.

My teacher and friend, Rabbi Larry Hoffman of HUC-JIR in NY, wrote a moving d’var Torah this week about the juxtaposition of death and life and how that theme played itself out in the rebellion of Korach and the subsequent sprouting of Aaron’s staff:

“Moses placed the staffs before God in the tent of the covenant law. The next day Moses entered the tent and saw that Aaron’s staff, which represented the tribe of Levi, had not only sprouted but had budded, blossomed and produced almonds.” (Numbers 17:7-8)

Rabbi Hoffman explained that the great shoot of promise exemplified in the buds, blossoms and almonds of Aaron’s priestly staff, is regenerative and always bends towards the sun. “Judaism elects that image,” Larry wrote as its preferred image, not the image of destruction, bitterness and negativity.

How true this has been in Moshe’s and Miriam’s family experience.

Moshe was a positive thinking man. He mourned the destruction of his family quietly, deeply, with reverence, and dignity, but he looked forward, started his life over (as did so many survivors of the Shoah), sought continually every day to rediscover the good in life and to celebrate it, showing love and being generous in spirit to all, taking sustenance from Jewish tradition and Jewish faith, and delighting in the joy of family.

An unknown poet has written:

“Four things are beautiful beyond belief:
The pleasant weakness that comes after pain,
The radiant greenness that comes after rain,
The deepened faith that follows after grief,
And the re-awakening to love again.”

Zecher tzadik livracha. May the memory of this righteous man, Moshe Tabak, be a blessing.

Does the World Really Hate Israel and the Jews?

14 Sunday Jun 2015

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The rise in anti-Semitic incidents in Europe, the fanatic Muslim extremism of Hezbollah, Hamas, Iran, ISIS, and the Wahhabis, the cancerous spread of the International BDS movement, the political manipulation of people’s fears and hatred of the “other,” a double-standard when it comes to criticizing Israel that doesn’t make the same demands of other countries in similar conflicts, all are cited by Jews and Israelis as evidence that the world hates us.

Let’s assume for a moment that they are right. Why would the world hate us?

Perhaps, the resentment comes from the biblical story about which most everyone is familiar and in which the Jewish people is the original recipient of God’s promise.

Or perhaps, the hostility comes from our people’s rejection of the prophecies of the founders of Christianity and Islam whose adherents dominate so much of the planet.

Or perhaps, the story of the birth of Zionism and the state of Israel provokes dissonance in the minds of those who abide the myth that Judaism and the Jewish people ought to hold an inferior place relative to classic Christianity and Christians, Islam and Muslims.

For whatever the reason (and there are many), it’s true that the world pays inordinate attention to us Jews and the state of Israel. There are more foreign correspondents in Israel today than in any other country except the United States.

Why?

Years ago, Tom Friedman wrote:

“Quite simply, the West has a fascination and preoccupation with the story of Israel, a curiosity about it, an attraction and even an aversion to it that is out of all proportion to the nation’s size. And equally, Israel has an uncanny ability to inject itself into the news like no other country of four million people.” (“The Focus of Israel,” NY Times Magazine,  February 1, 1987)

Friedman characterized Israel’s story as “the oldest, most familiar super story of Western civilization” of which “The Bible is the First edition,” and it is that super story, he suggested, that drives people’s attitudes towards Jews and the state of Israel.

Does the world really hate us?

In a recent poll, 71% of Israelis think that the world has a double standard when it comes to criticizing Israel, and 69% of Israelis say that Israel’s current relationship with the world is either “not good” or “not so good.”

It’s true that the world uses a double standard to measure Israel’s behavior and policies; but, this doesn’t mean that the world is against us. Though other countries expect a higher level of behavior of Israel, so do Jews because Israel was created for that purpose of being a moral “light to the nations,” and even with its remarkable accomplishments in every area of human endeavor, we Jews by nature do not settle for what “is”; we are a people seeking redemption for ourselves and for the world.

I do not believe that the world is against us. Nor do I believe that the vast majority of the world’s population cares about Jews or the state of Israel one way or another, because for most countries Israel doesn’t affect their populations who are far more concerned with and worried about other matters.

Of those who do care a great deal about Israel, their main concern is the occupation and the settlements, and about whether Israel and the Palestinians will ever be able to find a secure, just, reasonable, end-of-conflict two-state resolution of their conflict.

The truth is this – never in Jewish history have there been as many powerful leaders of more nations allied with Israel as there are today, even when Israel’s leaders insult them.

Millions of French citizens of every ethnic and religious background marched in the streets of Paris after the Charlie Hebdo and kosher supermarket terrorist attacks this past year. Those people were allied with Israel and the West. They were not against us, but we Jews who resonate more to headlines about those who hate us than to headlines about those who love us are quick to ignore statements of support and solidarity.

Yes, Hamas, Hezbollah, Iran, and ISIS are serious threats to the safety and security of the people of Israel. Yes, the international BDS movement and criticism of Israel in the blogosphere that quickly devolves into anti-Semitic ranting and delegitimization of Israel’s existence must be taken seriously and combated. Yes, there will always be anti-Semites. Of course, we have to be diligent in stating the truth and in our self-defense. But diligence in defense of our interests does not mean painting the entire world with the same extremist brush.

Last week’s Torah portion Shlach L’cha told the story of the 12 scouts sent by Moses to spy out the land, and we were reminded that we cannot be led by fear and the mindset of the victim. We are not “grasshoppers.” Israel is by far the strongest and most secure nation in the Middle East. Israel holds most of the cards in the relationships it has with the Palestinians and its neighbors, and despite legitimate threats against her, we foolishly build a fortress around ourselves and let no one in because we think the world hates us. They don’t!

National Poll of American Jews on Iran Negotiations and The Forward’s Response to Adelson’s anti-BDS Campaign

11 Thursday Jun 2015

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Two matters of vital interest to American Jewry and Israel:

1. J Street conducted a national poll of American Jewish support for Iran nuclear negotiations. American Jews are strongly in favor of the current negotiations with Iran and the P5 +2 going forward with proper inspection of all sites (including military sites) and provisions to reinstitute sanctions immediately upon Iranian violations of the agreement. See findings https://s3.amazonaws.com/s3.jstreet.org/images/j-street-iran-poll-1-pager.pdf

– See also this Times of Israel article on poll – “Most US Jews support Iran nuclear deal, J Street poll finds”, – http://www.timesofisrael.com/most-us-jews-support-iran-nuclear-deal-j-street-poll-finds/

“Overall, President Obama’s approval rating remains higher among American Jews than among Americans in general. Fifty-six percent approve of the way he is handling his job as president, compared to 45% of the general population, according to a calculation published by website Real Clear Politics from the same period.”

2. Wealthy Republican Right-Wing supporter of PM Netanyahu Sheldon Adelson is pouring money into fighting BDS on American college campuses. I am opposed to BDS, but we have to ask ‘Is Adelson’s money and approach good or bad in the fight against the BDS movement on college campuses?’ The Jewish Daily Forward editorial staff says it is not, and I agree with them.

See “The Wrong and Right Way to Beat BDS,” Jewish Forward
http://forward.com/opinion/editorial/309821/how-sheldon-adelson-could-really-fight-bds/?utm_source=feedly&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Main

“It’s hard to see what sort of productive role Sheldon Adelson can play in [fighting BDS],” writes the Forward editorial board. “But there is something that he can do. He can call his friend Benjamin Netanyahu and remind the prime minister that it is in his power to resurrect genuine negotiations with the Palestinians, repair his frayed relationship with the Obama administration and rescue Israel from growing international isolation. That might, indeed, save the day.”

From Grandparent to Child – Recording Memories

07 Sunday Jun 2015

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Few of us know anything about our families beyond three or four generations going back. This is a sad deficit, and so in helping to prepare young people to become bar and bat mitzvah, my synagogue schools initiated a family legacy project to help our students and their parents record as much of the history of their families as is possible.

We asked them to search for historic family documents, photographs, family trees, recorded memories, memoirs, and ritual items. We also asked the students to choose an elderly individual to interview.

This is an important and fun task for children who gain a sense of and identity with these members of their families and a greater sense of their family history. There is also great satisfaction that the older members of our families take in relating their stories to future generations.

To aid our students in the interview, I developed a list of questions they could use. Since most grandparents love telling their grandchildren about their lives, all the students need to do is gently prod their elder’s memories and, if they are fortunate, the floodgates open.

Here is the list that I give to our prospective b’nai mitzvah:

1. To begin, please write down the names of everyone in your family: parents, siblings, children, grand-children, your grandparents, and great-grandparents – their names and approximate dates of birth and death, where they were born and where they died.

2. Can you tell me your own earliest memories growing up? How old were you and where were you when you had those memories?

3. Where were you born? Did you have brothers and sisters? How many of them had children and grandchildren? Do you know your Hebrew name?

4. Were you named after a relative? What kind of a person was your namesake?

5. How did you celebrate your birthday when you were growing up?

6. Were you a member of a synagogue when you were young? Where was your synagogue? Do you remember the name of your rabbi and/or cantor/chazzan, and what do you remember about them?

7. What did you do for fun as a child and as a teenager?

8. Who most significantly influenced your life when you were young? Who were your mentors, and what did you learn from them?

9. Did you feel “different” in your school, and if so how? How did you cope with feeling different?

10. What factors influenced your choice of profession, employment or way of spending your time?

11. How old were the oldest of your relatives that you remember when you were young, and when and where were they born?

12. What can you remember about your parents and grandparents that I might be interested in knowing? What were they like? What did they do for a living? What were their hobbies? Were they athletes, readers, writers, artists, musicians, scientists, doctors, nurses, lawyers, judges, business people, laborers, tradesmen, or teachers? What was the most important accomplishment they would say they achieved in their lives?

13. What important hardships and challenges did your grandparents and great-grandparents face?

14. What were they most proud of at the end of their lives?

15. What languages do you speak and what languages did your grandparents and great-grandparents speak?

16. What countries have you and did they live in?

17. Did you or they experience anti-Semitism? Were you or they survivors of the Holocaust? What can you tell me about yours or their experiences?

18. Were your parents and grandparents observant Jews? Do you believe in God, or, are you a skeptic or an atheist? What about your parents, grandparents and great-grandparents?

19. Are there any Jewish ritual items in your family that are very old? Do they have stories attached to them?

20. If one side of your family is of another faith tradition, what is that tradition and how did your grandparents and great-grandparents practice their religion? Were they part of a church community? If so, where and what was the name of the church and their pastor/priest? Are there ritual items that they have and are there stories attached to them?

21. Did you ever visit Israel? What do you feel about Israel as the national home of the Jewish people?

22. Did you travel much in your life? Where have you been? When did you go there?

23. What world events most influenced your life, the lives of your parents and grandparents?

24. How would you want to be remembered by me?

Question for interviewee: What characteristics and virtues of the person you are interviewing do you most admire?

J’accuse! Social Media and Moral Culpability

04 Thursday Jun 2015

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I follow the principle that unless I’m prepared to have reported what I say and write on the front page of the New York Times, I keep my mouth shut.

Too many people, however, think little about the consequences of what they write on the internet. They use social media without discretion and without a sense of responsibility for the negative consequences on others when they vent their rage, disappointment, irritation, frustration, and disagreement.

In Israel last week, an Israeli government bureaucrat was accused of racism on Facebook. The accuser is an African American woman who made aliyah years ago. She entered a government office with her children to arrange for passports, claimed she was rudely shunted aside by the clerk and not treated as other women with children were treated in the office. She said that the government clerk, 47-year-old Ariel Runis, “told me that if I was complaining about discrimination, I should ‘Get the heck out of his face.’” (Haaretz, May 26).

Enraged by the perceived slight, she went home and posted on Facebook that Runis treated her badly because of the color of her skin. Her post spread quickly and grabbed more than 6000 “likes.” News sources picked up the story without fact-checking and ran it. It became a national story.

Mr. Runis was attacked widely throughout the state of Israel in an already charged racial environment following alleged racist police brutality against Ethiopian Jews and PM Netanyahu’s election campaign against Arab-Israeli citizens.

Runis’ description of the incident is very different from that of the offended woman. He said she had refused to wait in line, demanded special treatment and wanted to push ahead of other mothers with children who were quietly waiting their turn. He denied that his treatment of her had anything to do with the color of her skin.

Runis was humiliated and shamed by the accusation that he was a “racist,” said that his life’s work, including personal activism on behalf of social equality and justice, had been “erased with one stroke.”

The Facebook slander of his character and the media extravaganza pushed him over the edge. He shot himself in the head.

Runis’ suicide could not have been caused only by the public shame he suffered. Other inner demons had to have played their part in his psychology. However, one cannot deny the damage done to his reputation and the public humiliation he suffered by this woman’s Facebook post.

Fundamental ethical questions about responsibility in this case have to be asked. Who is responsible?

Runis himself ? Of course.

The woman?  Yes.

Facebook? Yes.

The media in its 24/7 news-frenzy and rush to get the story first? Yes.

Everyone who read the Facebook post, forwarded it and commented on it? Probably.

It’s my conviction, and I believe backed up by Jewish tradition, that all the above are morally responsible in this case.

Jewish tradition has much to say about the ethics of gossip (l’shon hara – lit. evil tongue) and slander (r’chilut), comparing l’shon ha-ra to the three cardinal sins of murder, adultery and idol worship, the commission of which prevents perpetrators a place in the world to come. (Babylonian Talmud, Arachin 15b).

Tradition also warns that the people who listen to gossip are considered worse even than the person who tells it because no harm could be done by gossip if no one listened to it. The Talmud says that l’shon ha-ra kills three people: the person who speaks it, the person who hears it, and the person about whom it is told. (Ibid.)

Yes – social media has a positive function in our society, but social media is a potentially dangerous weapon in the hands of irresponsible and self-centered individuals who think little of or care little about destructive consequences to other human beings.

I’m reminded of the young yeshiva bucher who told tales about his classmates, was called into the rebbe’s study who instructed the boy to take a pillow, climb a hill, cut the pillow, release the feathers into the wind, and then return to the rebbe for further instructions. When the boy completed the task and returned his rebbe told him to collect every single feather, return it to the pillow and report back to him.

The boy said, “I can’t do that Rebbe!”

His rebbe said: “So too you must guard your words, for once you speak them you can never get them back!”

This tragic incident in Israel shows how important it is for us to hold our tongues and remember that if we don’t want what we say and write to appear on the front page of the New York Times, then we must be silent less we shame others publicly and destroy their good name.

Threats Against the Jewish people in Europe and America

31 Sunday May 2015

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I refer you to three important articles that raise questions and challenges concerning Jewish well-being in Europe and America.

The first is a provocative piece that appeared in The Huffington Post that recalls the classic Jewish fear that we are an “ever-dying people,” yet it shines a light on the specific challenges facing liberal American Jews today on the one hand as well as the ultra-Orthodox Jewish community of America on the other.

The second is an investigative report in The Atlantic on the rise in anti-Semitism in Europe and what might be the future of Europe’s remaining Jews.

The third is a short op-ed that appeared in New York’s The Jewish Week, concerning the attack on American Progressive Zionists by the Zionist Organization of America (ZOA). My predecessor at Temple Israel of Hollywood, Rabbi Max Nussbaum (z’l), served in the 1950s as the President of the ZOA. He was a German refugee, a prominent Zionist and social activist, and, as his widow Ruth told me several years ago before she died at the age of 98, her husband Max would have been appalled had he lived to witness the behavior of the current leadership of the ZOA in its brazen slander against progressive American Zionists leaders.

Historically, we Jews often have been contentious with each other, but when threatened, we have usually pulled together as one. Not so today, it seems.

The threats today against the Jewish people, Judaism and the state of Israel are coming from a number of different places, including the international BDS movement, Islamic anti-Semites, classic European anti-Semites, terrorism, and Iran.

Internally we’re threatened by assimilation, Jewish ignorance and passivity, the Israeli settler movement and its supporters in the new Israeli government, and a lack of resolve to find a solution to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.

These articles are likely to disturb, as well they should!

1. Bad for the Jews, Bad for America – Huffington Post – Sandy Goodman (retired producer for the NBC Nightly News), May 26, 2015
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/sandy-goodman/bad-for-the-jews-bad-for-america_b_7425212.html

“The American Jewish community is coming apart at the seams. Its vital center is collapsing, and the entire group is increasingly polarized by runaway growth at both extremes: religious fundamentalism on one end, secular non-belief on the other. The result is not only bad for the Jews, but bad for the rest of America.”

2. Is It Time for the Jews to Leave Europe? – The Atlantic – Jeffrey Goldberg, April 2015
http://www.theatlantic.com/features/archive/2015/03/is-it-time-for-the-jews-to-leave-europe/386279/

“For half a century, memories of the Holocaust limited anti-Semitism on the Continent. That period has ended—the recent fatal attacks in Paris and Copenhagen are merely the latest examples of rising violence against Jews. Renewed vitriol among right-wing fascists and new threats from radicalized Islamists have created a crisis, confronting Jews with an agonizing choice.”

3. ZOA Has Gone Too Far in Criticizing Progressive Zionists – The Jewish Week – Kenneth Bob and Gideon Aronoff – May 22, 2015
http://www.thejewishweek.com/editorial-opinion/opinion/zoa-has-gone-too-far-criticizing-progressive-zionists

“The Hatikvah Slate [the Progressive Zionist slate in the World Zionist Congress Elections] – Ameinu, Partners for Progressive Israel (PPI), and the Zionist youth movements Habonim Dror and Hashomer Hatzair – have and will continue to actively oppose the global Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions (BDS) movement. But we were forced to waste over four months and significant financial and human resources defending ourselves from distortions by ZOA and others aimed to expel progressive Zionists from the Zionist movement and to limit use of the eternal symbols of Zionism, like the name Hatikvah, solely to the Zionist right.

Instead of fair competition for the hearts, minds and votes of Zionists, ZOA acts to defame committed supporters of Israel, and progressive Israelis who are working to defend their country’s future. Ultimately, the ZOA’s hostile and distorted rhetoric and attacks on progressive Zionists, threaten the unity of the Jewish community and its collective effort to support for the State of Israel.  During dangerous and challenging times like today, this is a cost that the Jewish community and Israel simply cannot afford.”

A Rabbi’s Ethical Will – A Challenge for Liberal American Jews

29 Friday May 2015

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The following is my Congregational “Ethical Will” that my synagogue will include in a new time-capsule to be opened at some time in the future. My synagogue is today nearly 90 years old and we have just finished a 13-year process in which we have completely rebuilt our schools and buildings into a modern state of-the-art facility. We are a healthy synagogue community of 950 family units, but our current health is no guarantee for the future. What follows, to be opened in 30, 40, 50, or even 75 years, is a statement of my hopes for my future congregants, read perhaps following my death.

May 28, 2015 – Sivan 10, 5775

Dear TIOH of the Future:

As the Senior Rabbi of Temple Israel of Hollywood, I am gratified by what so many have accomplished together in nurturing our synagogue community and distinguishing it as the vital, enriched, loving, and progressive Jewish community that it is today in 2015.

We have grown three schools with an enrollment of nearly 700 students from pre-school to high school, and developed a strong Jewish learning community of adults, an inspired worship experience for individuals and families of all ages, engaged social justice activity, a Jewish arts and emerging arts education program, and strong relationships with our Israeli Reform sister synagogues, Congregation Mevasseret Zion and Congregation Kodesh v’Chol in Holon, as well as an invigorating family exchange program between our 6th grade Day School students and the 6th grade Israeli students at the Tzahalah Elementary school in North Tel Aviv via the Tel Aviv-Los Angeles Partnership. We have also introduced more than 250 adults and children to the land and state of Israel on congregational trips.

We are a strongly identifying liberal Jewish community in the heart of Los Angeles, but we know that there is still much to accomplish, much to learn, many unaffiliated Jews to draw in, and much healing of people, our community, city, county, country, and world for us to effect.

Despite what we have learned to do well, and despite the current challenges left unaddressed, I worry mightily about our collective Jewish future not only at Temple Israel of Hollywood, but amongst American liberal Jews as a whole. Demographic studies of the American Jewish community suggest a serious cause for concern.

The 2013 Pew Research Poll indicates that the American Jewish community numbers today between 4.5 million and 9 million, depending on how one defines ‘who is a Jew.’  Seven in ten Jews nationally in non-Orthodox communities are intermarrying; one-fifth of all Jews say they do not believe in God; and two out of three are not affiliated with a synagogue community. Though 90% of all American Jews say they are proud to be Jewish, 30% say they are not religious in any way. Two-thirds of non-religious Jews do not raise their children as Jews. Many of us worry whether our grandchildren and great-grandchildren will be Jewish at all.

We cannot know what the state of your community will be as you read this, 30, 50 or 75 years from now. Will your generation be literate Jews? Will you know Hebrew, Torah, Jewish texts, Jewish history, ethics, and culture? Will you have faith in God? Will you increase the numbers who identify as liberal Jewish Americans? Will you have a strong sense of Jewish connection with Jews living in Israel and throughout the world? Will you be engaged as Jews in the messianic work of tikun olam, healing an unjust, hard-hearted and broken world?

I speak on behalf of our congregation, staff and lay leadership today in 2015/5775 and wish you Temple Israel congregants of the future well, and I hope for you the following:

1. That your knowledge and love of Torah and Judaism’s sacred literature, history, language, culture, ethics, and the state of Israel will be strong;

2. That you will be practicing Jews in your homes and here in the synagogue;

3. That mitzvot will be the primary business of this congregation and your lives;

4. That your prayer will be meaningful and enriching, filled with moments of personal and communal transcendence and joy, rooted in Jewish tradition’s great spiritual legacy;

5. That Torah and Jewish ethics will continue to be at the core of this congregation’s mission, that kindness will characterize all relationships in the community between staff, leadership and congregants, from the very young to the very old, that TIOH will be a model of ethical living and human decency in Los Angeles, and a place where ideas are freely debated with civility and mutual respect;

6. That every human being will be honored and valued here and outside these synagogue walls by virtue of being created b’tzelem Elohim, in the image of God;

7. That TIOH will be, as it is today, an inclusive community of Jews and their families (Jewish and non-Jewish) from around the country and the world, embracing the straight and LGBT communities, and Jews of color;

8. That you will visit the people, land and state of Israel with regularity, study there, support its democracy and Jewish character, and consider it your national home as it is the national home of the entire Jewish people.

May your Jewish lives be enriched and rewarding, and may you be worthy always to stand humbly before God.

With every good wish from my house and family across time to yours,

Bivracha, u-v’ahavah, u-l’shalom,

John L. Rosove
Senior Rabbi – Temple Israel of Hollywood

Why Mail-Order “Ordination” is a Troubling Solution to a Real Problem

25 Monday May 2015

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I come across compelling articles frequently that I wish I had written myself. This is one such article that I recommend to those who are contemplating marriages or who have children, grandchildren and friends who are doing so:

“Why a Real Clergy Person Should Perform Your Wedding” – By Rabbi Jeffrey Salkin
http://jeffreysalkin.religionnews.com/2015/05/21/why-a-real-clergy-person-should-perform-your-wedding/

My colleague, Rabbi Jeffrey Salkin, reflects about a growing trend in the United States generally and among Jews in particular in which large numbers of non-clergy are acquiring instant mail-order “ordination” in order to be able to legally perform wedding ceremonies for their family and friends.

Wedding ceremonies conducted by these individuals, Rabbi Salkin rightly observes, are very different in kind and in intent from ceremonies in which authentically ordained clergy officiate.

He notes that whereas authentically ordained religious leaders have spent, in most cases, their lives building and nurturing religious community, counseling individuals, couples and families, adults and children through life-cycle events from birth to death, and studying their respective religious traditions, histories, rituals, customs, symbols, liturgies, ethics, and values, weddings conducted by those who receive instant mail-order “ordination,” though usually motivated by the desire that the officiant have an intimate personal relationship with the wedding couple, likely will reflect almost none, if anything at all, of what traditional religion and authentic clergy provide.

Ordained rabbis and cantors bring substantial knowledge, wisdom, insight, and authentic religious and spiritual experiences to the chuppah and can help couples about to marry establish the appropriate groundwork for their lives enriched by religious tradition, understanding and community.

Many authentically ordained rabbis and cantors also are trained in pre-marital counseling and can help couples navigate through potential problems before those problems become irreconcilable conflicts and the marriage fails.

Yes, there are undoubtedly wise and experienced people who may be qualified in some respects to officiate at non-religious wedding ceremonies, such as some judges and some older members of families and friends, but such ceremonies will necessarily be qualitatively different from that which authentically ordained clergy conduct.

This trend is a disturbing reflection of the increasing fragmentation of our community, a diminution of Jewish peoplehood into familial units, an over-emphasis on individual needs, a lack of real engagement with religious community, and an alienation from Jewish tradition and Jewish values.

Rabbi Salkin’s blog is an important read, and I am grateful that he wrote it.

Who Are You in this Fourth Stage of Life? D’var Torah Bemidbar

22 Friday May 2015

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Mi at – “Who are you?” (Ruth 3:9) – So asked Boaz. It’s a question that every human being asks from time to time. Especially on this weekend of Shavuot, of the great meeting between Israel and God on the mountain, we ask ourselves individually and as a community – “Who am I/Who are we?” in this time and place, at this stage of our lives, as individuals, as a people, and as a nation.

This Shabbat we begin the fourth book of the five books of Moses, Bemidbar (Numbers; lit. “In the wilderness”). If the Book of Genesis is about human and tribal origins and beginnings (mirroring infancy and childhood), and Exodus is about human freedom (representing the driving force amongst adolescents), and Leviticus is about the need to adjust to the rules and regulations imposed on society in order to live productively (characteristic of young adulthood), then Bemidbar is about the mid-life journey.

In this fourth book we see that the bloom is off the marriage between God and Israel. Doubt, disillusionment and struggle define our people’s lives. We rebel. Our faith is broken. We want to be somewhere else, anywhere else if it brings relief and renewal. We confront our limitations and mortality. We wonder if this is all there is. We’re caught in the unfettered and cruel desert, a vast wilderness of silence. Our hearts pound. The quiet thunders in our ears. We’re alone and afraid. We yearn for safety and solace.

The wilderness of Sinai is far more than a physical location. Bemidbar is a human wasteland, where everything falls apart. We wander, without a shared vision, without shared values, or shared words. Leaders of every kind attempt to lead; but no one is listening and each is marching to the sound of his/her own drummer. Driven by fear and jealousy, ego and greed, the people are moved by basic things; hunger, thirst and lust. God’s transcendence is elusive. The book is noisy, frustrating and painful.

Rabbi Eddie Feinstein has written (“The Wilderness Speaks”, The Modern Men’s Torah Commentary, pages 202-203):

“Bemidbar may be the world’s strongest counterrevolutionary tract. It is a rebuke to all those who believe in the one cataclysmic event that will forever free humans from their chains. It is a response to those who foresee that out of the apocalypse of political or economic revolution will emerge the New Man, or the New American, or the New Jew. Here is the very people who stood in the very presence of God at Sinai…who heard Truth from the mouth of God…and still, they are unchanged, unrepentant, chained to their fears. The dream is beyond them. God offers them freedom, and they clamor for meat…”

L’havdil – I am not Moses, nor has my experience been his remotely, yet as a congregational rabbi I understand our greatest leader’s burden of leadership. In the course of Bemidbar “everyone in [Moses’] life will betray him. Miriam and Aaron –  his family members – betray him, murmuring against him. His tribe rebels against him… his people betray him in the incident of the ten spies… and finally, even God betrays him [when he hit the rock and lost his dream of ever entering the Promised Land].” (Ibid)

Numbers is a book about burdens, not blessings. Again, Rabbi Feinstein:

“Everyone has found himself in that excruciating moment when words don’t work – when we try and say the right thing, to heal and to help, but each word brings more hurt. Everyone has tasted the bitterness of betrayal – when no one stands with us, when those who should know better stand against us. Everyone has felt the deep disappointment of the dream turned sour. It could have been so good! I should have turned out so differently! Where did I go wrong? Everyone has tortured himself with the torment Moses feels in Bemidbar. And that’s the ultimate lesson. Listen to the Torah’s wisdom: the agony, the self-doubt, the frustration are part of the journey through the wilderness. Anyone who has ever worn Moses’ shoes or carried his staff – knows the anguish of Bemidbar. But know this, too: You’re not alone. You’re not the first. You’re not singled out. And most of all, you’re not finished. The torturous route through the wilderness does not come to an end. There was hope for Moses. There is hope for us.” (Ibid)

Where does hope come? In the turning of the heart, the turning of a page, the discovery of shared values and shared purpose, of shared life, shared listening, and shared doing.

In Deuteronomy, the fifth and last of the five books of Moses (representing our senior years when we begin to integrate who we are and rediscover our greater purpose), we’ll hear “Sh’ma Yisrael – Listen O Israel.”

In Devarim (Deuteronomy), “words” return and we’re able to share as a people in listening to God’s voice and to each other. In this, there is hope yet to come.

Shabbat shalom and Hag Sameach.

12 New Rabbis – A Bit of Counsel and a Prayer

20 Wednesday May 2015

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I was privileged to attend the ordination of 12 new Rabbis this past Sunday in Los Angeles from the Reform movement’s Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion (HUC-JIR). Because the ordination ceremony was held in the Sanctuary of my synagogue, Temple Israel of Hollywood, HUC invited me to offer the invocation.

I was ordained myself 36 years ago from HUC-JIR in New York and remember well the excitement, exhilaration, pride, optimism, hope, and, not a small amount of trepidation that must have filled the hearts of these young men and women (see names below).

As the 500 family, friends and members of the HUC community (faculty, staff and rabbis) gathered in our Sanctuary, the 12 “almost Rabbis” processed and took their seats. I approached the podium and offered these words just moments before Rabbi Aaron Penken, the President of HUC-JIR, placed his hands upon each of their heads in the traditional gesture of s’michah (“the laying on of hands”) and pronounced them “Rabbi in Israel.”

I said:

“Zeh hayom asah Adonai, nagilah v’nism’cha bo!
This is the day that God has made, let us sing and be joyful!” (Psalm 118:24)

B’ru-chim ha-ba-im – Welcome esteemed teachers and faculty, colleagues, parents, grandparents, friends, and kim’at (almost) “Rabbis in Israel”…

As rabbis, in whatever ways you will serve our people and faith, I can assure you this after my own 36 years tilling the soil in this unique vineyard of matter and spirit, that you will be challenged and tested as you’ve never been before, to think broadly, to learn from our traditional sources every day, to respond with uncommon passion and compassion to the needs of others, to be endlessly patient with people and ferociously impatient for truth and justice, to dig into your soul’s wellsprings seeking God’s life-affirming power, and then, working and reworking what it means for you and us to be progressive Jewish religious leaders amongst our people.

The only thing I can say with any certainty at all is that if you wish to rise to your best selves, and you allow yourselves to be pushed to your limits, you will feel exhilarated in ways few others will understand, for being a rabbi in Israel is unlike anything else I know.

In these brief moments, I wish to leave you with a few truths I’ve learned over the years serving our people:

First – Always follow your heart, but be smart about it.

Second – Never compromise your values and principles, but choose your moments carefully and go “to the wall” rarely, for there’s much truth possessed by others that will expand and enrich your own sense of the truth.

Third – Find the very best and brightest, the most creative, kind and special among our colleagues, your congregants and friends to join you as partners in your sacred work, for only then will you soar as if on “the wings of eagles.” (Isaiah 40:31)

Fourth – Never stop even for a moment studying our sacred literature. Learn as much Hebrew as you can. Memorize as much text as you are able. And push yourself to break through convention while at the same time respecting your community’s rhythms and needs.

Fifth – Put your emphasis always on the half-full glass, and regard the half-empty, but don’t dwell there nor allow yourself overexposure to toxic people who will steal your heart, soul, mind, and strength if you let them.

And finally, place your family’s and friends’ needs over work even as you give your all to your congregants and community.

I know I speak for all HUC alumni scattered around the world in wishing you well, joy, happiness, and fulfillment in this sacred work.

On this Yom Y’ru-sha-la-yim, despite its history of violence and strife, may the Holy City that lives at the center of our people’s heart and soul inspire you in your sacred work as ohavei am Yisrael u-m’di-nat Yis’rael, lovers of the people and the State of Israel.

The Jewish world needs you, and remember that you are never alone.

Ma-zal tov, chol ha-ka-vod, ti-hi-yu ba-ri, ta-a-ko-vu a-cha-rei lib’chem, teil’chu b’dar’chei sha-lom!

Congratulations and much respect; may you be healthy; follow your hearts; go the ways of peace, and “May the works of your hands and the meditations of your hearts” (Psalm 19:14) make you worthy to stand before God and before the people of Israel.  Amen!

The Los Angeles HUC-JIR Ordination Class of 2015 (5775):
Rabbis Courtney Leigh Miller Berman, Allison Dorie Fischman, Amanda Beth Greene, Rachel Kaplan Marks, Molly Beth Plotnik, Lara Leigh Pullan Regev, Jason Samuel Rosner, Gavi S. Ruit, Todd Harris Silverman, Samuel Louis Spector, Beni Wajnberg, and Bess Bridget Wohlner.